Tamia - Still

Why should i be here.. Why was i put on this earth just to get hurt.. Why does god or whoever take everthing away from me like its nothing.. Why always me.. I actually believe that if i really did die that no one would really care.. Well at lease the one i want to care.. 

This might be my last post on this xanga.. I guess everyone was right when they say nothing good last forever.. Well i guess everyone was right also for saying that ill never find anyone for me.. I thought i did but i got dropped like i was nothing.. Thanks for everyone who supported us through it all.. But it looks like theres nothing anymore.. I hope everyone enjoyed reading about our life and our... i mean her precious thunder.. Im really thinking about what if i do kill myself.. No one will know i left anyways.. Well everyone stay safe and out of trouble..

I gave you everything you asked for but i guess that wasnt enough

R.I.P Christopher Yamamoto - You were the one that did anything for me as a best friend and as a brother.. I still cant believe your gone.. Watch over me please..

AndrewJulianAsis&StephanieRaeMonzon
 November 9, 2003 - February 18, 2005

I know your still there.. But why wont you come out..

edit - to everyone and even you if you still read.. i uncovered every entry on this xanga so you can see how everything was.. enjoy reading the post and when you read.. make sure you feel what your reading or else they just wouldnt make sense.. we had our bad times but we also had a lot more good times.. and reading these post all day today made me break down in tears i gotta admit.. i hope everyone knows how i feel.. but dont forget that you should know how she feels also.. theres always two sides to the story.. mines just wasnt important.. enjoy everyone..

FINE.. YOU WIN.. YOU FINALLY WIN.. YOU ALWAYS SAY YOU NEVER GET WHAT YOU WANT.. BUT YET I GIVE YOU EVERYTHING YOU WANTED.. AND NOW I GIVE YOU THIS.. YOU WANNA GIVE ME AND TORTURE ME FOR STAYING ON THE PHONE WITH A FRIEND WHEN YOU BROKE UP WITH ME AND I NEEDED TO VENT.. BUT WHEN YOU BREAK UP WITH ME ITS OKAE FOR YOU TO GO OUT WITH ANOTHER GUY THAT YOU USE TO TALK TO.. YOU SAID YOU WOULDNT DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO ME BUT OBVIOUSLY YOU DID.. YOU BROKE MY HEART BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN SHIT TO YOU.. IM JUST ANOTHER NOBODY YOU WALK ALL OVER BECAUSE I DID EVERYTHING I COULD FOR YOU AND IT WASNT ENOUGH.. FINE.. LIKE I SAID.. YOU WIN.. I WONT CALL YOU.. I WONT BUGG YOU.. I WONT SAY ANYTHING TO YOU.. CONGRAGULATIONS WITH YOU AND WHOEVER..

The End

hey everyone.. damn xanga feels so far from my mind right now.. so much shit is going through my mind i dont even know what to think.. well sorry for not xangaing lately.. school has been hectic since i wanna graduate.. school is fine though..

hmm.. ever since that car accident its been so hard to see my baby.. i hate this and i wished that i still had my car cause if i did i would be xangaing at her house right now with her taking so new pictures for all your guyses enjoyment.. well you see people.. everything has been screwed for a while and i hope it gets better.. i hope i can finally see my baby that i havent seen in like almost a month.. our anniversary is coming up this wednesday and plus my bday and then valentines day for everyone..

Baby, your all that i have and look up to in my life.. i really dont know where i would be right now if i didnt have you here by my side to guide me though all the stress and stuff going on in my life.. theres been a lot of things said but not mean and i know we dont mean it because its just a rough time right now.. i know we are strong enough to overcome all this BS and be the way its always been.. like when we first met.. talk all night and day til school started.. take pictures all the time and cut school and stuff.. yeah i miss those days ever since all this BS.. i just need your assurance that your gonna be here to stay by my side.. theres a lot of differences that need to be settled right now and i hope that you can open up to me and give a chance for some change.. i know im ready for anything that comes our way and im hoping you are too.. there is only one girl in my life for me and thats you.. well theres more to be said but only to you.. just remember that im your little shellfish and that i love you more than anyone could ever describe.. all my bad habbits ive learned from them and also changed because of you and i thank you for that.. well.. i love you baby and dont ever forget that.. hope to see you soon.. mwachas.. bye

EDIT- in my face

hey everyone.. well jsut wanna say that were doing just fine.. and everything is great.. now lets see.. what we have been doing for a while is trying to find her some little timberlands.. has anyone saw a size 3 in boys anywhere in stores.. its so hard to find.. there so cute and when i tell people they always say DAMN HER FEET ARE SMALL.. because they are.. i wanna hang her shoes on my back pack or in my car.. lol..

well this week was really nothing.. oh yeah.. HAPPY LATE THANKS GIVING GUYS.. it sucks because i was suppose to pick stee up to go to my gma's house but it was already to late because she had to work on thanksgiving.. OMG everyones off work and everything but not her.. its okae.. we saw eachother the next day hehhe.. i really wanted her to be there though.. sorry you didnt get to go to san deigo to see lola babe.. its okae because when christmas comes they have better let you take those 3 days off.. and if not then they can concider that your 2 weeks notice.. blood is thicker than water..

well my babby had work all this week and i just stayed home and caught up on some school work and also caught up on bonding with my family..  its was alright.. whoa then on my moms bday dinner.. HAPPY BDAY MOMMIE.. my sister told me that a guy named danny asked about stee cause they go to school together and my sister works with him.. and my sister was like yeah.. and it was all random because htats all he asked.. hehhe.. its okae sis maybe theres more or something.. see babby peopel ask about you from my family.. because your part of my family.. hehhe..

well today was hard waking up for school.. i just didnt wanna wake up but i did because i got in trouble last week.. long story i sort of dont wanna talk about.. i dropped my brother to school and then headed to pick up my baby like everyother day of the week.. she wasnt feeling to happy so when i picked her i bought her breakfast.. im sorry i didnt finish your food babby because it just gives me a headache now eating it.. idk why.. well yeah and then i was off to school.. now im home and im tired.. im gonna take a long nap.. but i just wanted to xanga before i did.. sorry if i didnt og to sleep sooner babby..

well thats it for me guys.. hope you enjoyed.. and remember.. if it doesnt kill you.. it only makes you stronger.. LMAO!.. i dont know i got that off a TV show or movie.. well im out.. i love you my babby..mwahs.. cya everyone

hello everyone this is drew and DAMN its been so long since ive xangaed.. well school and all got me caught up in a whole lotta mess of graduating..

well if you guys didnt know which probably you guys have.. today is my baby and my 1 YEAR ANNIVERSARY.. im so happy that we made it this far even though all the hard times we've had.. but as you know everyone has their struggles in a relationship.. but yeah HAPPY 1 YEAR ANNIVERSARY MY BABBY SWEET..

well today we just chilled like its a normal day because school tomorrow.. but we have a 4 day weekend thats gonna be fun even though she has work.. its okae.. well yeah we ate some filipino food.. oh yeah when i first got to her house.. she got all crazy because she scenced that i ate one of her ferra roches and just blew up on me.. how did you know babby.. are you psychic or something.. hehehe.. then we played a little GTA san andreas.. OMG she loves this game.. she plays it like everyday..hehehe... well then we ate dinner which was the filipino food and boy was that good.. after we played with our pride and joy.. yes thunder is still alive and in the flesh for a hellova long time..hehehe its because he loves us.. oh yeah theres this cat that keeps going in their backyeard looking at thunder and he gets hella scared.. its okae thunder daddy will protect you..

well i just wanna start out this new year with my baby and say that.. im sorry for all the really bad mistakes ive made in the beginning of the relationship and although you may never forget them.. if you would just concider putting them to the side and starting this new year off with a clean slate.. i mean its up to you.. but i really wanna apologize for everything i have done to you that was wrong.. im sorry.. i love you babby.. and i dont know what i would do if you were in the arms of another man..

*gets tearie eyed.. whoa.. *wipes face.. i love you babby.. never forget that.. your the only one i need in my life.. mwahs.. your the best..